Previously on Modern Family: Bringing Up Baby
It’s back to school time. Haley’s heading to college, Lily’s going to kindergarten and at Manny’s suggestion, Jay and Gloria are taking a parenting class. Phil and Claire are moving Haley into her dorm and in typical Phil fashion (Haley Dunphy Moving Co. anyone?) they embarrass her until she pretty much pushes them out the door. But later, when she is feeling a little lonely, she calls to say she loves them.
On Lily’s first day at kindergarten she gets into a hair pulling scuffle with a boy in her class. Cam flies to her rescue and semi-assaults the little boy. The principal calls the boy’s parents who turn out to be Pam (played by Wendy-McLendon-Covey, Reno 911, Bridesmaids) and Susan (played by Michaela Watkins, formerly of SNL), lesbian couple. The two couples do nothing but bicker until they realize that they’re children “love” each other. Then they put their differences aside.
Jay and Gloria don’t take their parenting class seriously and kind of get kicked out and get up and leave. Manny, however doesn’t think this is funny. But Jay and Gloria let him know they’ve got it.
As Jay and Gloria are beginning to embrace their pending new parent status, Cameron is feeling unfulfilled with Lily gone to school and Phil and Claire have decided that another baby is not in the cards for them and Phil should get a vasectomy. Naturally Phil is terrified and since Claire has spent the whole day doing stuff for the kids, he gets stuck with Jay as a chaperone. His apprehension builds as Claire’s certainty does. But in the end, after sweet moments with the kids. Claire decides it’s not what she wants, and Phil gets to keep the goods.
Jay is worried about having a girl. He’s good with boys, he can relate to them, but girls, girls make him nervous. Phil helps him realize that Jay is not the man he used to be and now he’s much more equipped to raise a girl. Gloria is denying her pregnancy but refusing to admit that she needs maternity clothes. Until, on an outing with Manny she rips both her shit and her pants. Then it’s maternity clothes or bust (literally)
Though its a sensitive subject, Mitchell wants Cam to get a job so he can feel more worthwhile. Since he doesn’t want Cam to take it the wrong way Mitchell coerces him a bit with a setup with a store manager. One of the other store employees gives the game away and Cam storms out furiously. But once he and Mitchell talk they decide that Cam would be much happier if he
went back to teaching music.
- Phil grabbing Haley’s roommate’s ass
- Cam, Mitchell and the lesbians screaming about the kids
- The venn diagram
- The Mermaid cat costume
- Phil: “not a real man”
Claire: “Haley going to college in a miracle, Lily going to kindergarten is the law.”
Cam: “Is this kindergarten or the Hunger Games?”
Jay: “I’m having a baby at 65. You wanna another surprise Gloria? Buy yourself a box of crackerjacks.”
Phil: “I’m totally pumped. Pumped pumped pumped, Pump up the jam, Pumped up kicks, Pumpedy dumpty, Pumple-stiltskin.”
Alex: “Why are you talking like dad?”
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