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previously on modern family: new year’s eve

Party Crasher

Well this certainly is a surprise…

It’s Manny’s last birthday before the new baby and Gloria wants to make it the most memorable by throwing him a surprise party. She pulls out all the stops for Manny, gathering all his friends and family at the house. She and Jay pick up a cake, well, actually they steal a cake because they’re short on time, but the sentiment is the same. But while everyone is waiting in the dark to surprise Manny he enters the house with a girl and kisses her. When the girl sees his family she screams and runs out the door. Manny runs up to his room. Gloria goes up to try and coax him out and when she finally succeeds her water breaks. She goes into labor and everyone gathers to welcome a baby boy into the family.

Haley, meanwhile, is dating a much older guy (Kenny, the jeans designer, played hilariously by Rafi Jason Mantzoukas) which of course really bothers Phil who wants nothing more than to punch him. But Claire reassures him that they have to wait it out. At the last second Phil is pushed to far and threatens to go after them, but Haley overhears the conversation and gets what she wanted: affirmation that her parents care.

Lily spends the whole episode snubbing Cam, who keeps accidentally injuring her. Mitchell mistakes it for Cam feeling like things are going too well at work, but really it’s just that he doesn’t want Lily to feel she is being neglected.

Best/Funniest Moments

• Lily getting into a “car accident”
• Gloria and Jay stealing the cake
• Phil not realizing Haley is dating the older guy

Quotes

Phil: These jeans just slipped on me so perfectly, my name must be “Pantserella.”

Luke: And the birthday video becomes a nature film.

Cam: We always knew there was a chance she’d be a bad driver.

Fulgencio

Is someone getting married?

It’s time to christen the baby, which really just means its time for a visit from the relatives we haven’t met. Gloria’s mom (Pilar, played by Elizabeth Peña) and sister (Soma, played by Stephanie Beatriz ) are visiting and while Soma diligently scrubs the house, does the laundry and cooks, Gloria’s mom argues about what the baby will be names and waves a gun at Jay while professing she never really liked him. While Gloria shows sympathy for her sister, we also realize there is some guilt mixed in with that. Apparently, Gloria stole her life, which comes to blows at the church, when Gloria offers to help her sister out and have her come live in America. A new cast member? This could be interesting. And Jay, compromises on the name, choosing the first name that Gloria’s mom wanted, Fulgencio, and giving him the middle name Joseph.

While Claire is out running errands for the christening, all the kids have issues they need her to solve. Phil offers to help, but none will let him. So he goes behind their backs and makes things worse, until he steps up to the plate as godfather and gets the results everyone needed.

Cam and Mitchell are making an effort to be less snarky because Lily has been doing a lot of back-talking and poking fun. Their effort to be good parents gets them uninvited to the party of year. And then they realize it’s not their snarkiness that has Lily biting, it’s Claire’s.

Best/Funniest Moments

• Montage of Luke taking care of the problems for Phil (ala The Godfather)
• The mother/daughter showdown in the church
• Lily’s snarky moments towards her fathers

Quotes
Phil: Is there some kind of dress code for Godparents?
Claire: You’re not wearing a fedora Phil.

Claire: You have an in law who no matter what you do, no matter how hard you try, you can’t win over.
Jay: What about it?
Claire: Oh that doesn’t sound familiar?
Jay:You’re not saying.
Claire: Mmhmm, yeah I am.
Jay: Son of a bitch, I’m Phil!

Lily: Today ladies!