Tag Archives: Denise Richards

30 rock recapping: idiots are people three! and the ballad of kenneth parcell

Previously on 30 Rock: Idiots are People Two

In an epic blog fail (partly due to one of the craziest (and not in a good way) weekends I’ve had in a long time), I did not recap Thursday nights episodes of 30 rock! Blasphemous! Total Botch! Disappointing Blog Wench! Call me/it what you will. You’re getting a recap now and you’ll like it (maybe, kinda).

The Best Friend Gang

In the first episode of last Thursday night, we received Part Deux of “Idiots are People Two”, titled “Idiots are People Three” (IAP3). Clever. So where did we leave off? Oh that’s right, Kelsey Grammer looking oh-so-James-Bondish, a passed out Pete, a worried Jenna and Kenneth, an idiot protest organized by Tracy Jordan, Liz trying to get Jack out of her head, and the end (or so we thought) of a gay protest.

Kelsey, Jenna, and Kenneth (possibly the most unlikely trio ever to be invented or The Best Friend Gang) are busy thinking up a way to make Pete’s supposed mercury poisoning look like an accident. They stage a Kelsey Grammer as Abe Lincoln show to clear the backstage area so Kenneth and Jenna can move Pete. Then Kelsey works his magic and voila! All better. Liz is furious with Jack and tries to get Criss to rip up the check because of the underlying purpose in its being written. Criss, who is new to these parts, doesn’t yet understand the Jack and Liz saga. Jack will forever be in Liz’s head and she’s always going to care what he thinks at least a little bit. Criss’s lack of understanding forces him to end the relationship. Jack is pleased.

NBC we have a Magical Horse

The gay protest is resolved, except for Devon Banks, an arch nemesis of Jack, who has suddenly reappeared in an effort to keep the protest alive and well. With his leverage Devon is asking Jack for help getting his children into St. Matthew’s pre-school, an apparently impossible quest. After schmoozing a St. Matthew’s Board member, who wants the sizeable donation pledged to him by the late Don Geiss, Devon and Jack track down Kathy (Don Geiss’s daughter), and in exchange for changing the NBC mascot to a magical pony, the donation is granted and Banks gets what he wants.

Jack realizes later that he may have jeopardized Liddy’s acceptance to St. Matthew’s. Tracy, Denise Richards, and the rest of the idiots have written the apology they want Liz to read aloud. It’s on an etch-a-sketch, which on one hand is preposterous and idiotic and on the other must have taken great skill. While reading the apology aloud, Liz realizes she’s being an idiot and goes back to Criss, who Jack decided to put on probation until further evaluation can be done.

Liz and Jenna BFFs

In the second episode of last Thursday night, Jack has decided to cancel the Page Program and replace all the pages with computers called “Not Kenneth”. Kenneth tries to get Jack to understand that this will never work, but he fails. Later when the anniversary present Jack had arranged for Hank, president of Kabletown, gets delivered to TGS on the 6th floor, instead of Hank on the 60th floor, he blames a computer glitch, but eventually realizes the Pages are irreplaceable.

Liz, who is fed up with Jenna’s behavior, decides to find a new BFF, which she isn’t sure how to do. She starts with the only other female writer at TGS, who turns her down. Then she tries to approach four all too familiar looking women at a trendy lounge. They reject her/she rejects them. She decides the best way to meet a new friend is to find someone like her. So she goes to a bookstore and knocks on the bathroom. Her new bestie is just as negative as her and Jenna’s new besties are just as self-absorbed. In a scene taken out of every romantic comedy ever written, they both realize they need each other, and hesitant run into a friendly embrace. Awwww!

Showing is Better than Telling

Tracy is having a birthday party and he wants presents. Dot Com and Grizz misinterpreted what Tracy said about donating to charity in lieu of presents. They explain that since he has everything they didn’t think he would need presents. Tracy then goes into a dark place and thinks about how having everything has given him nothing to live for. Dot Com and Grizz eventually repair the damage by finding something that Tracy doesn’t have (a banana cream pie made by a baker from his childhood), which leads Tracy to believe there must be other things he doesn’t have. So he decides to live, which he always planned on doing, he just wanted to show Dot Com and Grizz that he did want presents for his birthday.

Best/Funniest Moments

  • From IAP3: Jack’s Promotion of the new NBC mascot.
  • From IAP3: Denise Richards worried about the moving room also known as the elevator
  • From IAP3: Liz’s image of herself.
  • From IAP3: Kathy and her calming box.
  • From TBOKP: Frank realizes that Jack isn’t better than him.
  • From TBOKP: Hank moping about not receiving an anniversary gift.
  • From TBOKP: Kenneth not being the most popular page.


From IAP3

Kelsey: “Here’s to another successful operation by the Best Friends Gang.”

Jack:“Our new slogan, NBC: We have a magical horse, is testing…okay.”

Tracy: “My ringtone is the chicken dance. If I answer it, I won’t hear the whole song!”


Hank: “I didn’t care for Mr. Socko. In my day socks just kept their mouth shut.”

Dot Com: “You just bought Kareem Abdul-Jabbar’s bones, and he’s not even dead!”

Toofer: “He looks scared, like Lutz on an escalator.”

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30 rock recapping: idiots are people two!

Previously on 30 Rock: Dance Like Nobody’s Watching

James Marsden

Liz is wiping her face and looking jolly, so I presume she’s eating something delectable. Well hello Kelsey Grammer! What are you doing here? There’s something wrong with Pete? Oh my. Liz runs to investigate and OH MY!

Cut to: Eight hours earlier.

Jenna needs a light bulb replaced and we discover Liz’s new man is James Marsden. HOTT! Oh and Tracy is of course stirring up some trouble. His newest offendees (not really a word, just go with it), the gays, the most organized of all groups (as explained by Liz). Jack propositions Liz with a FWB  offer to get her to expose the truth about her new man.

Jack is appalled by what he learns: jobless entrepreneur, living with Liz, spells his name Criss. Kenneth and Jenna break a whole box of mercury containing fluorescent light bulbs in Pete’s sleeping place. Pete, after downing scotch and sleeping pills retreats to his sleeping place (where he goes when shit is hitting the fan) not knowing about the mercury.

Denise Richards and Tracy Morgan

Tracy is organizing an idiot protest of NBC networks, since Liz offended him when issuing an apology to the gays. The idiot protests includes everyone from tramps, to investment bankers, to loudmouths, to Denise Richards. When Liz goes home for a nooner (pancakes for lunch in Liz’s book), a hallucination of Jack pops into the room and starts criticizing Criss. You can practically see Liz second guessing the relationship.

Back at work, she demands that Jack says he like Criss so he will no longer reside in her head and criticize Criss. When Jenna and  Kenneth go to clean up the Mercury mess they find Pete and panic. Jenna calls Kelsey Grammar to help them cover it up because who else would you call? Liz gets a video chat call from Criss who tells her he got an investor. When he holds up the check, Liz sees it’s from Jack. Dun Dun Dunnnn, TO BE CONTINUED…

Best/Funniest Moments:

  • Kelsey Grammer cameo
  • Liz asking the gays if she is pulling off her hat. They reply no.
  • Jack’s denunciation of Criss with an resounding “GOOD GOD!”
  • Favorite Gay Protest Signs: “My Wife doesn’t know I’m angry about this” and “We still watch Bravo, but that’s it, except for The Voice”
  • Favorite Idiot Protest Signs: “This Marker Smell Good” & “I Haz Protest”


Jenna: “Picking a lock is like riding a bike…they’re both skills you need to escape the Atlanta Falcons equipment room.”

Tracy: “Remember when I offended stubborn people? That took forever to sort out.”

Jack: “Is it a stupid name? Like Dakota or Barack?”

Liz: “My jaw stopped popping.” (Demonstrates)

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