Tag Archives: IASIP

it’s always sunny in philadelphia’s best quotes: maureen ponderosa’s wedding massacre

Previous IASIP quotes: The Gang Recycles Their Trash

“Wait. What! You?! Wait, Liam, you’re marrying Maureen?”- Dennis
“Big time. Don’t be jelly.” – Liam McPoyle

———-

“Why did you want to break up the wedding?” – Detective Marconi (played by Jeremy Ratchford)
“For all the things he just said, that was accurate.” – Frank

———-

“They have to be stopped. The McPoyle bloodline has been clean and pure for a thousand years. This marriage is an abomination.”Ryan McPoyle
“Now, when you say ‘pure and clean’, uh, you mean what exactly?” – Sweet Dee
“Means we haven’t bred outside the bloodline.” – Ryan
“For a thousand years?” – Sweet Dee
“Yeah.” – Ryan
That makes a lot of sense.” – Sweet Dee

———-

“Deel-dul-le-dee. Miss me? Don’t answer that.” – Bill Ponderosa

———-

“My Maureen, you’ve…you’ve enhanced yourself.” – Dennis
“Yeah, I got my tooth fixed.” – Maureen
“I’m talking about your tits. Your big, giant, new titties Maureen!” – Dennis

———-

“What are you doing?! You doing a speech from Jaws? Are you doing Jaws?! We don’t have time for this shit, this is serious!” – Dennis

———-

“Legions of us thousand sturdy once ruled this fine land. Our bloodline was as pure as the driven snow.” – Liam
“Mmhmm…and then what happened?” – Sweet Dee
“Syphilis killed about half of us. Mongrelism got most of the rest.” – Liam

———-

“…if anything, it would turn you into a vampire.” – Mac
“Right. Or a bat. Or Batman.” – Charlie
“No. A vampire turns you into a vampire. A zombie turns you into a zombie. And Batman didn’t get turned into anything, he just likes bats.” – Mac
“That can’t possibly be what Batman is about. It’s about a grown man who dresses up like a bat…” – Charlie
“…who goes around solving crimes and mysteries. Yes.” – Mac
“These are Academy Award-winning movies. This is serious stuff.” – Charlie
“Well, you know the Academy, Charlie. I mean…sometimes it’s atrocious.” – Mac

———-

“C’mon, it’ll loosen you up a bit, make your butthole hot.” – Bill
“How is drinking a glass of milk going to loosen me up, Bill?” – Sweet Dee
“I spiked the milk with Methylenedioxypyrovalerone.” – Bill
“What?” – Sweet Dee
“It’s bath salts. Yeah, it’s like coke and acid and, like, meth all combined.” – Bill

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it’s always sunny in philadelphia’s best quotes: the gang recycles their trash

  • “Twenty bucks an hour, that’s an outrage, these guys are blasting us in the ass.” – Mac
    “We pay their salaries and they turn around and ass blast us? Come on.”
    – Dennis
    “What are you talking about? You don’t pay taxes, you don’t even vote.”
    – Sweet Dee
    “Who am I supposed to vote for? The Republican who’s blasting me in the ass or the Democrat who’s blasting me in the ass?”
    – Dennis
    “Yeah, politics is all one big ass blast.”
    – Charlie

(Sound familiar?)


  • “In the 1950s, yeah, you could drive around door-to-door in a windowless van and people didn’t think they were going to get raped. Now, they will think that. This is better.” – Dennis
    “I know, and plus, with the tuxedos, you know, honestly, who wouldn’t want their trash-man in a tuxedo? I know I would.” – Charlie

  • “The whore politician is outdated Frank. That is an idea that’s best left in the trash. I am presenting myself as a powerful lady.” – Dee
    “You’re presenting yourself as a banana.” – Frank

  • “Knock it off you lousy bitch.” – Frank

  • “Mac, you have an exceptional number of bugs in your teeth. You’re going to want to rinse those out, it’s disgusting.” – Dennis

  • “Hello/We bet you hate that smell (that smell)/That smell from all your trash (your trash)/We bet you’d like three charming men to take your trash from you (from you)/We have a limousine (a limousine)/That we can fill with trash (fill with trash)/So please let us take your trash from you.” – Charlie, Mac and Dennis singing a beautiful a capella sales pitch for their trash “business”

  • “I don’t get it. We take you to a titty bar and you say no to us. We bring you to this place with all these juicy dongs and you shut us down. What team are you playing for?” – Frank

  • “This man has been realigned. He’s a yestergay.” – Sweet Dee
    “What’s a yestergay?” – Frank
    “A lot of men bounce around from label to label, never quite finding their proper gay home. My hunch is that this gentleman has gone from a twink to a twunk to a twank.” – Sweet Dee

  • “I, for one, am of the belief that some things can’t be thrown in the trash, Frank. And your sexuality is one of them.” – Sweet Dee
    “I totally agree, some cocks can’t be unsucked.” – Frank

  • “The ‘gulls are shitting all over me.”  – Mac

  • “When was the last time a white lady pick up after you when you threw your orange sodas and your grape sodas on the ground?”Martina Martinez

  • “We should get rugs for the bar.” – Dennis
    “We should make rugs for the bar.” – Mac
    “Make them?” – Dennis
    “I got a rug guy.”  – Frank
    “We could put on a show where we play rug salesmen.” – Sweet Dee

  • “He’s a twink versatile, you watch yourself.” – Sweet Dee
    “Ooh, I wouldn’t be able to satisfy him. A twink versatile? That’s impressive.” – Dennis
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it’s always sunny: season eight teaser

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

SEASON EIGHT.

October.

‘Beware’, but mostly, be excited.

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it’s always sunny in philadelphia recapping: sweet dee gets audited

Will’s P.O.V.

Dee got her “surrogate money” back and she is $30,000 richer and plans on writting off the child as a dependent for the next 18 years. What a  sweet scam for Sweet Dee, right? Wrong. She is being audited by the IRS. Dee panics and needs to prove that she has a child – the she doesn’t have – to the auditor. Charlie and Mac tell Dee that getting a child for Dee to borrow is no problem and they will have one for her by the time she meets with the auditor. Mac and Charlie hold their end of the bargain…kinda (not really). They show up with two crucifixes wrapped in a blanket with a recording on a child crying. Just enough to escape the meeting as Dee tells the auditor that the baby is sick. They then invite the auditor to a faux-funeral for the “baby” – Dennis’ plan. The plan ultimately backfires when Mac and Charlie open the casket at the funeral to show a dead and disgusting dog. I don’t think the bar Dee or Paddy’s Pub has heard the last of the IRS though.

Meanwhile, the boys are trying to make some changes at the bar. Dennis wants to learn the secrets of the business from Frank. Frank has been making illegal transactions and their “books” aren’t exactly IRS friendly. Since Frank is making all the decisions about the bar Dennis thinks it is smarter to align with him if he wants to a make a profit…and some “puss”. Mac and Charlie branch off and create their own party to vote against Dennis and Frank. After Charlie and Mac recruit Dee to their side to get the majority vote Dennis causes a rift in the newly formed “Pickle Party”. After Charlie and Mac compromise on putting a crucifix in the bar they then begin to argue on how much blood should be on it. After realizing that Frank and Dennis are making them focus on trivial things instead of money, Mac and Charlie decide to ruin the funeral. The gang then votes to not let Frank make all the decisions around the bar anymore and go back to their adopted method of “organized chaos”.

I didn’t like this episode all to much but I think the best parts were when Dee’s story was the focal point. The rest of the episode seemed more like filler with a lot of flat moments. The idea that the IRS is still looming makes me think that we might be seeing the end of Paddy’s Pub soon…eek!

Nicole’s P.O.V.

Sweet Dee getting audited isn’t as funny as one might hope. We start the evening with the guys having an emotional argument over where the money Frank takes out of their paychecks is going. They decide to remove emotion from the equation and argue everything in a rational manner, which of course means the near opposite when it comes to the gang.

Dennis and Frank partner up on a scam, while Mac and Charlie search for a way to settle a lime slicing debate. Sadly, none of this was all that humorous. Dee isn’t all that stealthy, so watching her try and come up with a real baby to match the fake one she’d been putting on her taxes was “meh” as well.

Mac and Charlie together is probably my favorite combo, so I was in full support of the pickle party. However, if Paddy’s Pub were real, I’d NEVER be fine with ordering a Corona with pickle…ever. The funniest part of the night for me was Sweet Dee with the chili pepper in her eyes. Not only did she cry True Blood-esque vamp tears, but also Kaitlin Olson really brought her best physical comedy game to that whole moment.

Always Sunny isn’t exactly the most plot-driven show on television, but even by its own standards, nothing really happened this episode. I can only hope the whole IRS bit was a setup for future troubles. I’d love to see them squirm out of tax fraud charges!

Quotes

“I’M GONNA PUT MY THUMB THROUGH YOUR EYE YOU LITTLE BITCH!” – Mac (to Charlie

“Charlie, you can’t just start your own party. You gotta talk to people about…” – Frank
“Yes you can! When you’re not as educated or informed, what u gotta do is start your own party and you yell the loudest.” – Charlie

“People don’t trust you Frank. You’re a piece of shit! And you’re ugly. And you ooze sleaze. And you’re very very ugly.” – Dennis

“You guys better all eat a dick. Cuz Sweet Dee beat the system.” –Dee

“Goddammit! I don’t know how to express myself unless through and personal attack.” – Mac

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it’s always sunny in philadelphia recapping: frank reynolds’ little beauties

Just as the episode starts and Frank busts up his face – bloody broken nose and all – I was starting to think that this season of Always Sunny I was just going to have to deal with bodily fluids being a main part of each episode. I’m not the most squeamish person but at some point it’s going to get overdone and annoying. But looking pass that, the episode was classic Sunny gold…or yellow…I’m not sure.

Frank’s Little Beauties Pageant was inappropriate and beautiful. The gang makes the pageant about themselves as much as the kids and I greatly appreciated. Anytime the cast gets on stage I will, inevitably, compare it to the blockbuster performance that was The Nightman Cometh and this opening act was just as perfect. Whenever Charlie is given a microphone and Mac’s new belly bulge can’t be contained by his shirt AND awkward semi-stiff choreography is in the mix you can buy me two tickets to that show any day! Dee had a separate performance with a reluctant contestant. Charlie, Mac and Dennis gave “Yankee Doodle Dandy” a rave remix with the help of the lone male contestant. Pure genius.


If I can be promised at least two stage performances every season from the gang I don’t see how they can’t go another seven seasons easily. This was the first episode of the season that I thoroughly enjoyed from start to finish. I can’t lose faith in “the gang” and episodes like this help solidify my stance.

Quotes

When Dee use to enter pageants when we were kids Mom use to tell her not to waste her time because she wasn’t pretty enough.” -Dennis

How would you win pageants? Did u have a different face?” -Mac (to Dee)

I bet you wish you win this pageant don’t you?” -Dee
My mom says I’m not pretty enough.” -Justine
Your mom doesn’t know dick! She’s a dumb fat cow and your sister is a stupid little s**t mouth b***h, isn’t she?” -Dee

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