previously on how I met your mother: splitsville
The Stamp Tramp
Marshall meets an old college friend, Brad (played by Joe Manganiello) who seems a bit down in the dumps. Having lost his job and eating out of the garbage, Marshall decides to help him out with a stamp of approval and a job interview. The gang warns him that he gives his stamp too easily so it doesn’t really mean much. Still, Marshall plows ahead with his stamp and Brad bombs the interview badly, including insulting Marshall’s boss who is very sensitive about his height. Marshall has lost his boss’ stamp of approval, but gradually wins it back, until they learn that Brad being down on his luck was just a ploy to get information on a case. Marshall must win this case in order to keep his job.
Barney is shopping around for a new strip club and decides to enlist Robin’s help as his agent. Robin skillfully negotiates as the strip clubs send gift after gift to seduce Barney into choosing them. Robin ends up being bribed into selecting The Golden Oldies for her client, but Barney sees through it and chooses on his own. The two celebrate with a night at the strip club and a drunken kiss, which freaks Robin out.
Ted tried to prove that he was more than a piggyback stamper, but only found out that he was a big loser with no original ideas of his own. Except for giving Lily his stamp of approval when she and Marshall first started dating.
- Brad insulting Marshall’s boss and calling him Bilbo
- Robin’s negotiating
- Ted’s video diaries
Barney: I have nothing but the utmost respect for you skanks.
Robin: Bottom line Vito, a lot of strip clubs are into my client. If you want The Melon Patch to be in the mix we’re gonna need bigger melons and smaller patches. Otherwise your establishment is not where Barney Stinson is going to pitch his tent.
The Twelve Horny Women
Last week we discovered that this case would be the biggest of Marshall’s career. Naturally all of his friends call in sick so they can attend the case and support Marshall. It becomes clear, quickly that Brad’s case is thin; he’s got nothing. But what he does have is a killer bod, good looks, and oodles of charm. And he uses all of those to manipulate the 12 women jurors and the one not-so-straight judge (played by Don Lake).
Despite a glimmer of hope when Marshall brings in a rash infected duckling who lived at Frog Lake, the jury and judge are too mystified by the hot Brad. That is, until Marshall realizes Brad must be afflicted with a rash after his swim in Frog Lake, calls him to the witness stand, and forces him to take his shirt off. The jury and judge are persuaded and though Marshall wins his case, the fine is nowhere near what he was hoping for, which brings him before a panel of judges to pitch why he would like to be considered for a position as a judge.
Meanwhile, as Marshall fights for his case, his friends fight over who was the bigger teenage badass. Lily wins that fight, as everyone else’s stories of badassery are proven false. Honestly I wasn’t all that interested in who was a bigger teenage badass, but I suppose their stories versus reality were humorous.
- Teenage Robin getting an award for being the best hotel guest
- Lily slapping a cop
- “Lily coming'” as an ode to Omar on The Wire
- Judge #2 played by Dennis Haskins aka Mr. Belding
- Brad’s Frog Lake endorsement video
- Ted’s mugshot
Barney: Go ahead laugh. Laugh like all the others, but those magicians pulled off the greatest trick of all. They accepted me.
Robin: There is a dark side to being a rocker on the road north of the 49th!
Lily: I was like John Gotti in a training bra.