The Lobster Crawl
When Robin is told she can’t have something, she wants it even more, like lobster. Robin finds out that she’s allergic to lobster and cannot eat it, so naturally she goes crazy and eats it anyway. When Barney tells her he is done trying, she goes crazy and goes after him anyway. Pulling out her best trick and stunts Robin tries to seduce Barney only to find that he has taken an interest in her archenemy Patrice.
Marshall and Lily are concerned and frankly pissed about Marvin’s “firsts” that they keep missing, while Ted witnesses and documents them all for his personal scrapbook. They believe it’s because now that Ted’s first baby (his building) is all grown up, he needs a new project. Ted agrees to stop stealing their first moments and find a new project.
- Lily and Marshall discovering the scrapbook
- Barney’s bibs
- Robin dressed like Lara Croft
Lily: Do it! If you ever wanna see these boobs again, crawl you sonnova me!
Barney doesn’t seem to be letting go of this Patrice thing. Just like Robin doesn’t seem to be letting go of this Barney thing, which she denies is about anything more than needing to get him out of her system. Silly Robin, tricks don’t work on these kids. So she breaks into his apartment to get the playbook to show Patrice he is not who she thinks. She discovers Lily, who has been using Barney’s apartment as a breast-pumping station. Ted, who is trying to help Robin out (and get back his red boots), also ends up in the apartment. And all three are in the broom closet while they watch Barney burn the playbook in an act of devotion to Patrice. The gang is forced to stage and intervention for Robin.
Also, weird side story. Marshall’s mom and Lily’s dad did it. Marshall and Lily are horrified and end up in the closet, screaming under a blanket as they try to wipe the un-welcomed images from their minds.
- Marshall’s mom going to Lily for advice
- Marshall channel ling Andrew Dice Clay and Chris Rock in his stand-up act
- Marshall discovering his mom with Lily’s dad
- Robin and Lily both locked in closets in Barney’s room
Robin: I love Patrice, we’re like sisters.
Ted: You’ve never gotten through even one exchange without screaming at her.
Robin: Sisters fight Ted!
Barney: I’m gonna grab my robe!